Friday, September 25, 2009


These primarily white designs have such a charming & light, airy feel to them.
I sometimes wish i could paint the white walls of my bedroom here in this rented house, but now that i see these images, i rather like it! 
Plus, my room is so bright in the morning-the perfect natural alarm clock.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

As someone sets light to the first fire of Autumn:

It is the first official full day of Autumn!
This is the season that finds me exceptionally beaming.
My Autumnal Equinox was spent perfectly, peacefully intertwined with my love.

The above photo(my second one processed in the darkroom-excuse my dusty scanner) was taken on our labor day trip out to the blue hole:

where we made a pact to spend more days at next summer.

May your start to this beautiful season be as magical as mine has been thus far.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

some nights

...i just want to stay awake with the stars & the silence.
...& maybe this face, too.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

this guy joined our porch & wine night last weekend:
(click photo to enlarge)
he followed our shapes & jumped in my hair. several times.
i guess it looked like home to the little praying mantis.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

a jumbled post: a product of one AM

it is always late at night when i should be resting my body & restoring my mind that a stream of creativity & productivity flows over me, making me want to stay up all night painting, rearranging, contemplating, inventing, generating, planning, 

i've been spending time developing, printing, & lovinglovingloving being in the darkroom. 
since the age of 12 when i began taking photos i've dreamt of someday watching them come to live in a darkroom, from the work of my own hands. 
& it's finally happening, & i'm thrilled to see where it will take me.

as it is september, i have been thinking a lot about my late poppy, whose bright baby blues have not glanced my way for far too long. Though it's tough, it's a longing that i feel makes me a stronger person. i look back & miss all that used to be, but i know everything happens for a reason, & someday i might come to understand why his life was cut short.
for now, i'll go on missing him, & living happily as i know he'd want me to.

understandably, the mention of my grandfather gives me a nostalgic feeling of my childhood. which i find myself missing all the time. i certainly had a fun up-bringing--young, beautiful parents, jamming out to the smashing pumpkins in my dad's best friends garage at the age of four, dancing to madonna with my mom & sister, eating PB&J's late at night with my daddyo, & going on all day bike adventures with my sister only to return at dusk to climb in bed & dream of floating on clouds.
do you ever miss the feeling of everything being a mystery, as it is when you're a child?

nicholas' mom mentioned to me months ago that i should always practice recalling events from my past, that when i lie in bed at night unable to sleep, i should pick a year in my life & try to remember as much from it as i can. for, she says, you'll forget it all eventually if you don't make yourself recall it. 
what wonderful advice this was. 
i often find myself trying to delve into my deepest memories & the emotions of my past & transfer them to paper, for when i'm 60, i want to be able to look back & remember the times i picked blackberries in my grandma's backyard with my billion cousins & ate most of them before we could walk the bowl into the house to have grandma bake a pie. even now, at nearly 20, it's hard to remember your life at seven years old.
let us always remember the days of mystery.

(myself & my sister with our soxy, who lived for fifteen years & whom i miss all the time.)

Sunday, September 13, 2009


recent musings

i've felt at a loss for words lately, but for now, the beautiful things that i've been feasting my eyes upon will suffice.

Friday, September 11, 2009

five senses friday

i'm finally doing one of these, inspired by my best friend Natalie.

-my photos come to life in the darkroom
-the sunspots dance on the floor of my living room in the evening

-"all my days" by Alexi Murdoch
-my loves new creations

-so many apples & so much peanut butter
-my sisters homemade banana nut bread
-bell peppers & cherry tomatoes from my garden

-little Lili's soft fur
-the handle bars of my bicycle everyday on the way to class

-the fresh pre-autumn air
-orange ginger candles

happy friday! i'm so ecstatic that it came so quickly. 
i feel a lovely evening in the making-full of good friends, beautiful weather, & wine.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

another september 8th nearly passed

three years later, & it's still hard to believe you're not[physically]here with us, though i am sure where you are is as dreamy & golden as the last week has been here on Earth.
all the love in the world.